Father's Day custody battle

If you're wondering why September 30th was Father's Day, well, Australia has a different Father's Day than the U.S.

Of course, this wasn't actually Australian Father's Day either.

Australian Father's Day was back on September 2nd, only I couldn't partake in it this year. That's because my son was in the hospital with a broken arm sustained while climbing a tree the day before. It had been rainy, the tree was slippery, and, well, he slipped. He was actually in the hospital for three nights all told, meaning Father's Day was a total wash.

And while it was a very special Father's Day for other reasons -- I got to be there for my son, sleeping beside him on the fold-out bed in the hospital -- my family decided that a day to myself should be restored to me, and Sunday was that day.

We brunched in the beachside community of St. Kilda before they let me free to an afternoon to do with what I pleased. So I relaxed for a couple hours in the St. Kilda Sea Baths, complete with salt water pool, steam room and jacuzzi, before heeding the call of my familiar Father's Day activity: going to the movies.

And that's where the thematically ironic Custody came in.

The French film about a divorced couple fighting over their 11-year-old son wouldn't have been my first choice for an escapist afternoon at the cinema. As a point of comparison, on last year's Father's Day I indulged in some real escapism in the form of Logan Lucky. But of the lighter fare in current release, I was faced with options like Night School and The Predator, and they just didn't seem like quite the way I wanted to spend my 5 p.m. to 7 p.m. time slot.

So after one more beachside hurrah of a beer and prosciutto slices on baguettes, I made my way up to Cinema Nova in Carlton just in time for the 5:10 show.

And it sure did make me appreciate the ways to be a good parent, and not to be one. While I had expected a nuanced look at the problems of shared custody, with a "he said, she said" approach that left a lot of gray areas, this was really more about a monster dad who becomes (is already) a danger to his ex and kids. Note to self: Don't be that kind of dad.

Although Custody wasn't about the ways equally aggrieved parties who both have good cases try to win the affections of their offspring, it was tense as hell, which kept me awake despite the mid-afternoon beer.

Interestingly, we capped the evening with A Quiet Place, the 2018 film I am most surprised I didn't see in the theater (I tried once but it was sold out, and never got another chance). That too is about a dad trying to look out for the best interests of his wife and children, though in a far different way than the menace at the center of Custody. Note to self: Be like this dad.

And now back to our regular schedule of holidays on their correct dates.