Monitoring percentages and denying passes

I recently went back and added my last 50 films to my spreadsheet of all the movies I've ever seen. I get behind on this list, because it involves a bit more work than my other lists. It's not just adding a title to one Microsoft Word document -- actually four or five documents depending on the film -- which goes pretty quickly. It's adding a title, recording the director's name, recording the year, recording the running time, noting the venue in which I saw it (theater or video), and marking whether I give it thumbs or thumbs down, then adding to running totals of various categories at the bottom of the sheet. Even this would be relatively quick, but I also have a tradition of reading the review of whoever wrote about it on AllMovie, my old website from which I am now more than ten years gone, and this is what truly makes it seem like more of a commitment, not something I can just smash out in the few minutes before I go to bed.

One of the things I've become obsessed with as I maintain this list is my recording of the total thumbs up and thumbs down, which I update at the bottom of the page, and whose totals give me a percentage of likes and dislikes.

This percentage obviously doesn't change very much, as the ratio of likes to dislikes is fairly steady over time. But I do observe small changes, and it's the ones that move the "like" percentage upward that actually worry me.

For ages now I have been hovering around 67.85% movies I like, leaving 32.15% of movies I dislike. When it gets too close to 68%, I worry I'm not being hard enough on my films, and I question the very core of my critical faculties.

Right now, after the end of year period in which I watched mostly films I liked, it's at 68.06%.

What's wrong with liking more movies, Vance? Doesn't that just mean it's a good use of your time?

Sure. But what I'm really concerned with is whether I'm giving a pass to movies I actually don't like. 

It really comes down to the line of demarcation between movies given three stars and movies given 2.5 stars, which is the dividing line between a thumbs up and a thumbs down. Even though it's only the difference of half a star, it feels much larger than that. One feels like a reward; the other feels like an indictment.

I think I should be indicting more movies than I am -- or really, just realizing that 2.5 stars does not mean that a movie has no value.

I've discovered I have a tendency to give three stars to movies that are considered classics but that don't really connect with me. Like, an acknowledgement that "it must be me." The movie is considered great by other people, so that must mean it has a value that I'm missing. I'm recognizing strong techniques and observing a sort of objective quality to the film, but in the end it doesn't totally work for me.

Is that a three-star movie, or a 2.5-star movie?

I'm going to try to determine that this is a 2.5-star movie, or maybe even on the rare occasion, a two-star movie. It's not like I'm putting this assessment out anywhere in the world except on my own Letterboxd, or possibly a mention of it here if I write about it. It's not like I'm changing the conversation on the film. It's not like I'm contributing to lowering its fresh rating on Rotten Tomatoes. It's just me we're talking about here.

And I think I deserve to be honest with myself.

Even some of the movies I watched at the end of 2021 are a good example of this. I gave three stars to The Eyes of Tammy Faye, a movie I really didn't think worked all that well. I recognized good aspects to it and the movie definitely has value, but did I like it? I probably didn't really like it. 

I think on some level I was worried that I am spitting in the eye of Jessica Chastain, an actress I love, if I give a movie where she gives a really strong performance a thumbs down. Jessica will be able to take it. In fact, Jessica won't even know.

The goal of this adjustment in my methodology is not specifically to drive down that like percentage to the sub-68% range I am more comfortable with. Rather, breaching 68% has made me realize that maybe I'm just not being that truthful about a movie's actual impact on me. If I come away from a movie feeling disappointed -- not just relative to my expectations, but even in situations where I didn't have expectations -- I should not then be going to Letterboxd to give it three stars. I should not then be going to my movie spreadsheet, or a month later when I catch up again, to give it a thumbs up.

So these movies no longer get a pass. Starting now.

Having typed all this, I realize I have written at least one, and possibly multiple, posts in which I make this exact proclamation. You probably don't remember them, if you ever read them the first time, so it's "new to you." But I remember them, and it does make me feel a bit silly.

Then again, I reckon I am probably rehashing similar thoughts on this blog all the time, and when you have more than 2,700 posts, that kind of thing can't be helped. Besides, each new time I write about it, it's a reminder to actually stick to my guns this time.