Friday, March 25, 2022

Never get two popcorns

I attended my first advanced screening in some time on Thursday night, first since before omicron anyway. I saw Everything Everywhere All at Once, and as is my custom, I followed it up with a second movie, which was Ti West's X. I intend to write more about at least the first of these two movies on another day, but first I want to write about popcorn.

The first screening had complimentary popcorn and a drink, as is also the custom at these events. Because I thought I was running late for the 6 p.m. start -- the movie didn't start for another 20 minutes after I took my seat -- I missed that they were also serving gin in the lobby as part of a promotion. I would have certainly had some, but given that there was a second movie on the docket and I hadn't been home since I left my house at 7:30 that morning, it's probably better that I didn't.

The complimentary popcorn was a small popcorn, as is also the custom. I went through it ravenously, as apparently the two chicken skewers I'd purchased while walking up to the cinema were not dinner enough. The Coke didn't last super long either.

When the movie I ended, I had to rush to get out (more on that in a moment) in order to be sure I wouldn't miss any of the 8:30 X. Again, a miscalculation as there was another ten minutes of ads and trailers after I got in. But I also wanted some further food to sustain me for the second movie, so while I was getting my ticket at the candy bar, I opted for ... another popcorn. This time a large.

Bad decision.

I ate this one in a constant flow as well, but since it was much bigger, it took me much longer. I got down to the bottom level of it when I was struck with an overwhelming desire to stop eating it. Part of it was that I didn't have enough left of my second Coke to counter its saltiness, but part of it was realizing that I just ... couldn't ... eat ... another ... bite.

I felt okay for the rest of the movie, but once my feet got moving again when it finished just after 10:30, that was when the belching set in.

And I had to keep belching for about ten minutes to relieve the discomfort while I waited for the tram, the first of four conveyances to take me home. (Followed by a second tram, a train, and finally, my bike home from the train station.)

Even after this period of initial uncomfortable belching was done, I had smaller belches just to continue to try to settle things down there, pretty much for the rest of the hour-long trip home.

I won't be doing that again any time soon.

Sure, the first one left me wanting more. But a second one left me wanting a lot less. 

It was a costly trip to the cinema for reasons other than my guts. Because of the hurried departure from Everything Everywhere All at Once, I failed to properly check my seating area to make sure I had everything. I later determined that my AirPods had been in the breast pocket of my shirt when I'd taken it off at the start of the movie. I suppose it was possible I left them in X -- I walked out before the end of the credits there too -- but EEAaO seems the more likely culprit.

I would have noticed it in time to go back in and get them had I partaken in my usual routine, which is to start listening to something pretty much as soon as I leave the theater. But because I had now been out of the house for more than 15 hours, it was all I could do to hurry over to the tram stop to make sure I didn't narrowly miss the first of those four conveyances and have to wait another 20 minutes for the next one. Even though I had a good six minutes to wait once I got there, I was still in that thousand-yard-stare mode that left me too limp to kick off a podcast. 

I only discovered it at the train station, and then I was miles away from the theater.

I've sent them a message through the website so hopefully they will find them.

The funny thing is, just earlier that day, as I was getting on the train in the morning, I thought to myself how smart I was to always look back at where I had been sitting to make sure I hadn't left anything. I even considered trying to make a funny Facebook post about it until I decided it was just too pedestrian an observation to be worth sharing.

Lessons learned: Don't get cocky about your own genius life hacks, and definitely don't order the second popcorn. 

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